Journal 6

Well, I suppose you could say we haven’t had the easiest transition moving to Philadelphia, but, yes, we are settling in and settling down, and things are getting along fairly smoothly- thanks for asking! Discussing God’s abundance in class, and the reminders to look out for it, certainly have helped to get through the rougher waters, so thank you for that encouragement and discipling. Focusing on the goodness of God when things in life get hairy- like concerns with our pregnancy- genuinely help to calm my spirits, paving the way for me to serve my wife more effectively, which, I believe, brings glory to God.

Being mindful of the abundance with which God showers us almost seems counterintuitive in a sense. In a world that is not safe, having someone bless us so incessantly seems out of place- but then I am looking at life from the opposite perspective that God wants me to see from. The life of blessing, joy, abundance- the life of life, really- is the way that is truly human because it is the way we were created to live having been made in God’s image.

Unfortunately, the sinful bent of our hearts is to hoard things for ourselves; the philosophy of the world is to “look out for number one” and that number one is naturally me. Therefore, outside of Christ, people live to bless themselves, not others- a trait that I, to my shame, still see so often in myself. Consequently, I tend to build walls of self-protection around my own little kingdom separating myself from others so I do not have to part with my “selfs”: self- glory, esteem, aggrandizement, pleasure, service, worth, you-name-it. Thus, I drive myself to live in secrecy, as did Dave from the Yalom reading. A choose to live in the dark where no one can enter in and jeopardize my safety or plunder my treasure. At least, there are remnants of this in me; since Christ shed His light in my heart I have a new desire- to know and be known, and to share the blessings that God has lavished upon me.

The world is a scary place- because of the corruption of greedy sin. But with the deluge of blessings my God rains down on me the fears and worries of this life are like dust in the wind. His yoke is easy and His burden is light! And a life of humble service to Him is far better than being locked away in my dark castle. What a blessing to have been set free from my own selfish captivity by the bounty of his saving grace.